Yesterday, we had my parents over for a cookout … just a simple gathering of the five of us … some food … some music … and absolutely gorgeous weather. It was so lovely. We ate, played cards, enjoyed Isaac, ate again and just plain relaxed. (However, truth be told, Halis spent much of his time painting the new front porch – though he did so at a “leisurely” pace).
But as simple and uneventful as this leisurely cookout may have seemed, I will always remember it as being particularly momentous. This was the day that I first saw my Mother “play”. I cannot fully express to you how moving and gratifying it was to watch her enjoy my son – and herself. This is not something that my Mom usually does. Though she absolutely adores my son, she has never been one to sit down and play with children. Throughout my childhood, I always knew that she loved me, but I had never known her to play with my brother and I, read us books, or engage with us on our level. So, to see her do these things as “Grandma” gives me such pleasure … mostly because I know how good it must feel for her, too.
My Mom has always been one to enjoy chaos over simplicity. She works several jobs, always keeps more than one television going in the house, collects more indoor pets than anyone I know (that all require various degrees of attention), consistently has some reconstruction job going on at her house, etc…etc… I mean, I grew up with this woman vacuuming our bedrooms at 6am! She never stops cleaning! And when she is not cleaning, she is working, and when she is not working, she is out buying more stuff to clean … and she always wants more stuff … so she feels she has to work more to get all the stuff she wants. Aaaagghhhh…. it is a vicious cycle that would make me insane!
I am always suggesting to her that she needs to slow down and enjoy her life. That life is going to pass her by, (yadda yadda yadda)… We even have this running conversation where I ask her, “Mom, on your death bed, are you really going to be happy for all the money you have made, stuff you have accumulated, television shows you have watched, and for how clean your house was?” To which she usually replies something like, “Yes, I will be proud of the hard-working person I was and for all the episodes of Matlock that I was able to watch.” To each their own, I guess. And I do love my Mom just the way she is. Still, I have always wanted her to just fully experience the simple joys of life.
Yesterday, I watched her do just that! And it was so amazing to me.
She played, she laughed, she cuddled … and she just joyfully watched as Isaac did the same. And from where I sat, it looked like it felt really good for both of them. What a blessing.
Isaac really loves his Grandma “Bobo” … and I am so thankful. And my Mom is totally smitten by her special Grandbaby…. enough for her to slow down and really “see” him and enjoy him in a new way. I hope she continues to fully embrace the simple pleasure in tossing rocks back and forth to him, playing in the sand, and just watching him as he dances around the yard.
Life is good.