Happy (sort-of) Birthday, you crazy, wonderful country, you!
America, you are one of the greatest social experiments ever devised … and I am (usually) so proud of you. You’re growing up, kid! … continuing to mature … getting so big … learning some hard lessons …
And hey … I want you to know: I love you unconditionally. For real. You are worth it. Continue to do your thing … different from the rest, with a cast of characters that love you dearly even if they disagree on what to do with you (they all seem to mean well). Enjoy your day, America! You deserve it.
Oh yeah … and here’s the card I picked out for you:
Stay cool, my friend. Love ya lots,